Thursday Thirteen

Thirteen Foods I Hate 1. I'm a picky eater, so yes, there are thirteen foods. And some of them I'll admit are weird. Like COFFEE. I hate coffee. I really want to like it--it SMELLS so good, but it tastes like tar mixed with eau de roadkill. And what adult in America doesn't like coffee? Me. That's it. Just me. 2. Eggs. I used to eat them all the time when I was little, and now I can't stand the taste unless they're scrambled and buried under a mountain of ketchup and hash browns. 3. Egg salad. I see it, especially SMELL it, and I will lose whatever happens to be in my tummy at the time. I kid you not. 4. Brussel sprouts. I'm pretty sure I'm not alone in this. They look like little shrunken heads and they taste like farts. Gross, but true. 5. Peas. I'll gonna ick you out a bit and admit I can't stand these because it feels like little zits are popping in my mouth when I eat them. 6. Onions. I like them cooked because they take on the flavor of whatever you cooked them with, but raw? Ewwwwww. And they leave their pungent flavor behind. When they come on a salad I have to pick them off AND anything that's touched them. Contamination, I tell you. All that lettuce was fraternizing with the enemy. 7. Fish. I looks good, it even smells good. And all those cooking shows that say almost crusted salmon in a raspberry glaze make my tongue long to try it. Alas and alack, I have yet to experience fish that didn't taste like...well, fish. 8. Lamb. Let me qualify this. I LOVE lamb when it's prepared in the Greek style with all those yummy spices. Any other way is just foul (and I don't mean the bird kind here, either). 9. Sweet pickles. Give me crunchy, spicy, kosher dills. That other stuff need not apply. 10. Sweet potatoes. My grams just loves these any which way they come. Me? Not so much. They taste like potatoes that are trying too hard to be dessert. And that's just not right. 11. Tiramisu. I'm willing to admit that perhaps I've never had this prepared well, but every time I've had it the texture...or something...has just been a bit off. I can't put my finger on it. 12. Brown rice. It tastes like dirt. 13. Raisins. But only sometimes. I have an on-again/off-again relationship with the shriveled grape. Y'all are never inviting me over to your house for dinner, are you? I'm a very good guest, really! I'll eat whatever's put in front of me. The only tell I have is that if I hate it, I drink a lot of water with every bite. And then I'll need to use your bathroom. Links to other Thursday Thirteens!

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